What I am about to say may offend some....but I know I am right. So there.

Okay. I am going to preface this by saying I jut got finished talking to Todd about this, so I am still kind of riled up about it, and my adrenaline is pumping. Stuff like this makes me really angry. Arrgh!!!

Okay. Deep breath. Well, I just worked a direct flight from Houston to Honolulu where I was door greeter on the 767-200. This mainly means that I stand by the main entrance to the plane and tell people where to go to get to their seats in an orderly fashion during boarding. Well, at the very end of boarding this woman comes on with two kids - one boy who looks to be about 4 years old and an infant daughter along with all the accoutrements that said children might need on a nearly 8 hour flight. This is a little atypical because they should have been pre-boarded (came on first) because they obviously are going to take a long time to get settled in. She is traveling alone with her two children but had enlisted another passenger to drag her ginormous carseat for her boy down the jetway understandably. So I take a look at her seat, notice that she only bought two seats for the three passengers (another issue - something that I think is enormously unsafe but whatever....that's for another day). She has 18E and F. So I make it known to her that she absolutely must put the carseat in 18E so as not to block 18D's potential escape route in an emergency. I did my job, she went down the aisle to her seat. She did exactly the opposite of what I said. Of course. She installed her carseat at the aisle seat at 18F to block everyone in, and stall egress in the event of an emergency evacuation. I didn't actually see this, I was still up at the front of the plane, but another flight attendant, Ron, did catch it and told her that she must move the carseat.

Apparently she ignored his request. When he came back to check on her she hadn't done it and said she wasn't going to, and asked for his name. Jesus! Whenever this happens alarms go off in a flight attendants head, because airline management has a tendancy to believe any sort of ridiculous story that a passenger tells over their own trained professional employees; so, smart guy, Ron got our lead flight attendant, Shahid involved, who also got a ground agent involved. Long story short, I somehow got volunteered to hold her really sticky infant during boarding while the carseat got moved. If you know me, you know that I was born without the mommy gene. So, really, this lady is already not one of my favorite passengers. Didn't listen when I clearly directed her to do a simple task, making me be a babysitter, and already taking names to throw fellow crew members under the bus.

So, at the very beginning of the flight it is my position to sell headsets in the main cabin. So I have a little tray of them. The lady's 4 year old was out of control. I mean like Seed of Chucky style. Yelling at the top of his lungs "MILK!!!!!" Kicking, throwing some sort of graham cracker on the floor. She asks me if there is milk on the plane, to which I say "Yes, it is on the barcart, which is being set up at the moment. We are still climbing, it'll be about 10 minutes and we'll be out with a beverage and meal service." I was selling headsets at the time, remember. To which this bitch said, "well, if you want him yelling like this for ten minutes then fine," and rolled her eyes at me. What the fuck? It's not my responsibility to control and/or discipline your brat or to provide Chucky with his every demand. You, as a parent, should be prepared. So I continued walking through the cabin selling headsets. Water off a duck's back.

Just to let you all know, there isn't much milk on our flights. We have probably 24 pints in the main cabin. 12 pints are fat free. 6 pints for each of whole and fat free for each aisle; and 2 on each beverage cart are designated for our "creamer" for coffee and tea. Chucky drank all our milk. And then pointed to the ones on the cart for the creamers and screamed for those and cried like a bansie when we refused to give them to him. I am not shitting you.

So I go on break with Ron. Nice crew rest. We have a few giggles about the bitch with the milk. When we come up early, Debbie tells us that Lisa talked to Chucky's mom when she gave him the little airplane kid's wings. Okay. First - WTF! This lady has already threatened to write up one of your co-workers and you're codling them. My advice is to only deal with them when it is absolutely necessary - like during beverage services. Anything else is rewarding bad behavior. So already I was a little ticked off with my fellow flight attendants. I could tell Ron was too. So apparently Chucky's mom told Chucky to put the wings on his forehead. "Go ahead, stick 'em to your forehead!" This woman is an idiot.

So then Debbie goes into this sob story about how Chucky's dad is in Iraq and blah, blah, blah. About how she feels so bad for this woman, she's so lost. At that point I couldn't take it anymore, I snapped at Debbie, adrenaline pumping. This is what I said paraphrasing because I was fed up with Debbie, Chucky, his mom and all the bitches like her "You know what? That is bullshit! So what her husband's in Iraq? That has no effect on me, whatsoever. I came from a military family. That bitch needs to pull it together! Her husband needs to know that his family is a strong one and doesn't need to rely on the sympathy of others to get by. She needs to step up to the plate and be a parent to those kids! She knew what she was getting into when she married into the military. Her husband is off fighting a war and what is she doing? She sure as HELL isn't keeping the home fires burning! She is a complete mess!"

Debbie just sat there for a moment with her mouth gaping open and then said "Girl, you are in the wrong business."

I honestly think I am right on this one.

Oh, and as an added bonus, when we landed in Honolulu, the seats they were seated in were complete disaster zones. I mean food ground into them, wrappers on the floor, cups, ice, shit everywhere. I wish I would have thought to take a picture. Damn it.